Manic Monday

Manic Monday: a little manic on Monday. free to be Me the rest of the week.

Okay, so I am a little manic on Mondays.

For years, I thought if I was only smarter, more systematic, that if I created enough structure and organization in my life, I could...

• keep my house clean
• get all my kid's school projects, forms, applications, etc. in on time
• pay my bills regularly
• keep my house filled with groceries
• have a meal/menu plan
• save money with coupons
• stick with an exercise routine
• register my car
• call the insurance company
• live on a budget

then I would be free to...

• play with my kids
• sit and have coffee or a glass of wine with my husband
• write a book
• get a Master's degree
• start my own business
• pick up a hobby
• run a playshop
• meet up with friends for lunch
• host a holiday dinner party

Being a Real Grown-up in Real Life has way too many details for me. Not only are those "have to's" necessary but they are also extraordinarily boring to me. I would wake up every day with this long list of things I hated doing and the list never ended. So, I never was free to move onto the list of dreams. And that =depression for this Jenny.

One day, I decided to start dreaming. In spite of the dozens of books I have on Organizing my Real Life, I had to acknowledge who I really am and THAT woman is not me. I moved on to the part of my life that was LIFE to me. So I went back to school, I met with the other Jenny to work on Unwritten Travels, I started writing a blog. In the mean time, I discovered an exercise that is now one of my favorite things about my life, I tossed a load of laundry in here or there (helped that this was the year my kids and hubby were old enough to wash their own clothes) , the dishes kept getting clean and my children somehow got fed.

Let me tell you, it is fun to be me. So fun, in fact, I lost all sense of structure in my life. I continued to miss due dates on bills, drove around with expired tags for a couple of months, never got the kids signed up for sports in time, forgot to schedule that dental cleaning, and my family ate out all of the time.

That's when being me doesn't feel so fun. It feels like I am trying to do what I want to do while being haunted by the unwritten list of what I need to do. Thus explained my stress, anxiety, and overall crankiness.

Enter Manic Monday. One day. One hour (sometimes as many as 3) dedicated to getting things done. Not because I love making a list or checking things off. Not because having everything in order brings me a deep feeling of contentment. But because I need to be free to live my LIFE.

So, here I am. Looking another Manic Monday in the face. Can I tell you how much I dread this? I have to walk smack into the middle of my stress and anxiety and not walk out of it until at least one of those daunting tasks is complete.

Today I will:

• schedule the dr. appointment to get Avery's stitches taken out
• organize child care for my kiddos when I am in training next week
• schedule my hair appointment

What? Those things don't seem daunting to you? Well, they don't seem so scary to me anymore either. That is the magic of Manic Monday.

freestyle

freestyle |ˈfrēˌstīl|
adjective
denoting a contest or version of a sport in which there are few restrictions on the moves or techniques that competitors employ : freestyle wrestling.
noun
a contest of such a kind, in particular a swimming race in which competitors may use any stroke.

When bathing suit shopping last summer, I narrowed my options down to two: one that looked really cute and one that was very practical for swimming. I, of course, choose the cute one. Because what I really needed was a bathing suit that worked well for sitting on the side of the pool, laying out while reading a good book or visiting with a friend.

I have never been in need of a practical bathing suit because I don't swim. Now, I can swim. Like in order to keep my head above water. But, I don't know how to swim laps. And apparently I have always wanted to because I signed my kids up for swim team so that THEY would have a skill I wish I had.

This summer, I watched my kids succeed and fail as they pushed themselves beyond what they believed they were capable of doing. I was able to visibly observe their self-esteem growing as they overcame their fear of embarrassment and the exhaustion of an hour of practice while also developing a skill they can use for the rest of their lives.

Now we go to the indoor pool on a regular basis, where both of my kids jump in the swim lanes with all the older folks and do their own little exercise routine. I have watched them with great pride and pleasure as well as giving them little tips on how they could improve (keep your legs straight, take bigger breaths, etc.).

I surprised myself last week when I had the desire to jump in the pool and do some laps with my kids. I am a sit in the hot tub kind of girl. I am not a jump in the cold water kind of girl. But I REALLY wanted to swim laps. So, I asked my kids if they would teach me some basic techniques that I could begin practicing. We started with freestyle. That sounds like me, sort of create your style kind of stroke. How could I mess this up? Plus, it looks so easy and relaxing when the kids do it.

I did my streamline like they told me and then began kicking and moving my arms. I was just about to take my first breath when I smashed into the lane beside me. I popped my head up and saw that both of my kids and the life guard on duty were laughing so hard they couldn't breathe. The life guard actually said, "Did you mean to do that?" All of them were hoping that I was trying to be funny, because they wanted to be laughing with me, not at me. So, I laughed along with them...and then continued to bang into the side of the lane three more times. My daughter said, "Mom, you are really good with your legs. How about we try a stroke that only uses legs." I said, "Shouldn't I keep trying this first stroke until I get better?" She said, "Well, it is really your arms that make you look so funny." (Not banging into the side of the lane?)

I was embarrassing my kids more than I was embarrassing myself because I couldn't see what I looked like. So, I told the kids to go play in the big pool while I practiced. Guess what? I didn't get better. The life guard had to stop watching me in order to stop laughing. Even if I was able to get my legs and arms to move the right way and stay in my lane, I still couldn't figure out how to breathe. I was exhausted about 3/4ths of the way to the "finish line."

I have never been the kind of person who is good at something right from the start. There are few things in my life about which anyone has ever said I was "naturally gifted." This meant that whenever I tried something new, instead of feeling better about myself, I often felt worse. I began believing things like, "I'll never be good at anything." and "Other people can do those activities for fun because they don't look like fools while doing them."

The older I get, the happier I am that I have a long history of embarrassing moments in my life. Being used to that feeling, I am able to see all of the reasons why my "freestyle moment" was a good moment instead of slapping an I'll never do that again! label on it.

• I got in the water with my kids.

• I was able to offer them an opportunity to be the expert on a subject I knew nothing about. I gained a new respect for their talent and their perseverance.

• I will check in with myself before tweaking my kid's performance especially when I have never tired to do what I am asking them to do.

• I showed them that even at 35 years old with a strong self-confidence, I get embarrassed and people laugh at me.

Best of all, I loved it. There was a quietness and a focus under that water that was wonderful. I loved it so much that I am going to try it again. And I hope that every time I try something new, I will bring that much laughter into the world.

super-heros, super moms and me

I am not a super-hero.

I have always detested the term “super-mom” mostly because I will never be one. I want to be a mom but I also want to be alone for some time every day. I want to work and I also want to play. I want to be learning something new every day and I want to have a life of adventure. I want to spend no time cleaning or cooking but I want my house to be clean and I want to serve healthy meals to my family each evening. I want to wake up early and stay up late, but I also want a goodnight sleep. Did I come up with these unrealistic expectations of life all by myself? Or do you have them, too? Because the to-do list that goes along with this life is something only a super-hero (or Jenny Watson:) could accomplish.

This is why I love The Sight-Seeing Chapter: taking a fresh look at your life. There is no such thing as a plan I can create and then stick to for the rest of my life. Just as my roles, responsibilities, and resources are evolving every season, so must my perspective and my plan. What’s working in my life? What is not working? How can I set up a life that supports the person I want to be? The marriage I want to have? The family I want to grow (just to be clear, I mean grow-up not grow in numbers) and not go crazy between now and then?

As I wrote out my daily schedule, squared my exhausting moments, triangle-d my exhilarating moments, heart-ed my relational moments, and circled my alone times, I discovered the theme of my summer to be SQUARE-CIRCLE-SQUARE-CIRCLE. Which translated means exhausted/recovering/exhausted/recovering. The other morning when my husband was leaving for work he said, “Will you please take a nap today?” He was really hoping I could stay awake for our stay-at-home date that evening. I am often too tired to enjoy my favorite moment of every day which is when my husband and I finally get to connect after the kids have gone to bed.

In her book, A Weekend by the Sea, Joan Anderson writes that our time management goal is “to stop doing time and start being in time.” I want to live the days that have been gifted to me. I want to enjoy my children. I want to be fully present for my husband, my friends, and my clients. I want to celebrate important moments of life. I want to notice the simple pleasures that sparkle around my busy days. I want to know God more fully today. I want to be as much me as God created me to be.

This picture is from a serious of art cards I made for myself. I stick them next to my rear view mirror where I see them often. I use them for journaling, praying, hoping, and getting perspective. This was my first art card. A super-mom, no doubt. So why did she inspire me? Well, I noticed this little smirk on her face. And it made me realize that a super hero knows her purpose. She is practical about her strengths and her limitations. She knows what her kryptonite is and she stays away from it.

Being a real hero means letting people believe whatever they want to believe about you, while you know what is really important, when to take action and when you have to sit back and recharge.

Thoughts to Journal...

What’s working in my life?

What is not working?

How can I set up a life that supports the person I want to be?

For the relationships I want to have?

For the people I want to nurture?

Daisy Chain

You walk into a store and your heart starts beating faster the minute you walk in the door. Research says men are visually stimulated, but researchers just haven’t tested women who have just seen pieces of clothing that scream, wear me and you will have fun and feel beautiful!

The Daisy Chain is a fabulously unique boutique. Walk around the mall. Go in every store, and then go to The Daisy Chain. You will not find these brands anywhere else in town, or at least I haven’t. But it’s not just the clothes. It’s way more.

Do you ever look at celebrities and think, “Oh how I wish I had a stylist who could help me find clothes that are right for me. I need help developing a personal style. Wish I could afford that!”

Well, you can because it’s free at this store.

The staff range in age from high school students to mature women, but what they have in common is that Courtenay Jackson, the store owner, has empowered them with her own vision. She envisions a place where moms and teen daughters can shop together and both find treasures that look great on them. I know there are many of us who hate having a sales person follow you around while you are shopping. But, this is a no-pressure zone. The staff has an uncanny way of looking at the pieces you are choosing, discerning your taste and then comes the best part. They actually help you find the pieces that fit your style and fit your body.

Since you know there are two Jennys that write on this site, I feel it necessary to divulge which one is writing this article. Jenny B. could put on a sack, tie a rope around it, and she would look amazing, but this article is written by Jenny W. Let’s just speak the truth here, at my age and slight pudginess, it is harder for me to live out externally the hot babe that I am internally. I have even gone into the dressing room at The Daisy Chain with my girdle underwear that I bought off of a TV infomercial, and the staff there has treated me like I am a beauty.

My wardrobe is becoming more and more filled with signature pieces from this store. When I am out with friends they will see things and comment that the item “looks like me.” I have a style. When I really want to look my best, I consistently pull out the items in my closet from my Daisy Chain shopping experiences.

While you will pay more for clothes here than at TJ Maxx or many places in the mall, the value is huge. Do you have many articles in your wardrobe that fit and are fine, but you don’t get excited about wearing them? The items you invest in here will be your “go to “ items. They are high quality. I am building a wardrobe year by year, still wearing the first items I bought seasons ago. You get a personal stylist with your purchase, and they carry jewelry, shoes and handbags, so you can get everything in one place.

The store is small, but there are 100’s of items because Courtenay purchases one item in its available sizes, so you know you won’t see everyone in the same piece. Shirts range in price from $30.00 to $80.00. Dresses go from $70.00 to $140.00. But if you get on the store’s mailing list, you receive monthly coupons that can be used on two items per month. If you want to receive the coupons, find out more about the store and check it out in greater detail, go to www.daisychaintn.com, and then become a facebook friend.

While the clothes in themselves could be considered wearable art, that isn’t actually the only art in the shop. The Daisy Chain has gifts from dishes to stationary, each of which is also unique.

So, go to the store to renew your exterior. While you are there, purchase a copy of Unwritten Travels to revamp your interior for a whole new you. You will walk around town and hear people whisper, “Who is that? She must be someone famous.” Just smile, look great and either leave them guessing, or be kind and send them to Courtenay.

what's inside?

Well, we took the dare! Melinda made the suggestion that we reveal to you the inside of our fridge. Make sure to check out her blog.

The fridge that will inspire you to whip up a snack:

my 3 favorite things (jenny w.) - fake cucumber slices chilled to put on my eyelids
leftover spaghetti that tastes even better the second time around.
pepperjack cheese and garlic stuffed olives


I am almost embarrassed about my refrigerator. It really isn't that messy ever, but it because I'm into "systems." Every Wed. morning our trash comes, so every Tuesday night or Wed. morning, I throw out anything old and kind of visually inventory what we have. Also, have a separate frig in the garage and a separate freezer in the pantry, so I am set on refrigerator and freezer space.

And here's the fridge that will inspire you to order out:

So, here's mine (jenny b)...I hope you will still come over to my house for dinner sometime:

My 3 favorite things:
hint water (no sweetener just a hint of raspberry/lime or cucumber)
trader joe's turkey bacon
coke zero

What is the most surprising, disturbing or unusual thing inside your fridge?

Come on, we showed you ours :)

Spruce~Inspired Living

Walked in to a store one day, and immediately my blood pressure went down. At the same time, my senses were heightened in the loveliest way. If it’s true that, “it’s in the details” then there is a store in Brentwood on Church Street that is doing “it” right.

Walk in to hear a playlist of jazzy, folksy, music that sounds how I sound in my fantasy life. Passing by one display of bath products I literally had to sit down on one of the many pieces of furniture available for purchase just to soak up the aroma for a while.

Noticing the tag line after the store’s name, I realized that Unwritten Travels and the store, Spruce share an ideal – inspired living. I had to meet the person who was obviously inspired when they opened this store and was pleased to talk to one of the owners, Alicia Helm.

Alicia and her business partner, Ashley met while renting space in the same location to sell products that brought beauty into a woman’s life. They were both drawn to home décor and gifts and their tastes were very similar. They call their style “transitional.” I just call it lovely, comfortable and inviting but not fussy. They decided they would open their own place for other women to rent space to sell beautiful things. As they grew and their vision developed, they decided as of March 1^st of this year to switch to doing their own buying for all of the products they carry, resulting in a store with an identity all it’s own.

Spruce has gifts - wedding gifts, baby gifts, stationary, yummy candles and bath products for your best friend. They have furniture, paintings and unique things that my grandmother would have called knick-knacks, but seem like necessities that you can’t live without when you are in the store. A favorite of mine is the beautiful hourglass that looks like blown glass with black sand inside. Surprisingly affordable too!

You could shop other places and check things off of your to-do list, but if you want to feel like you are treating yourself while you are running an errand go to Spruce. While there, decide to spruce up your life by purchasing a copy of Unwritten Travels. Whether you are buying a gift for someone else or for yourself, the experience at Spruce is actually a gift you are giving yourself in itself. Can you purchase an inspired life? Give it a try. The surprise will be a pleasant one.

what's inside YOUR purse?

In Jenny Black's Purse:

Wallet (ID, check cards, check book, pens, money)

Cell Phone

Keys

Broken button

Toss up game

Frindle by Andrew Clements

Tide stick

Wax candy

Tic tacs

Two check books

Pouch with pencils, pens, paperclip white out, eye makeup brush, emory board

Moose Farkle

Perfume sample

10 pens

2 highlighters

a plastic fork

two zotz, one zots wrapper

b-12 folic acid

white out pen

nike ipod shoe thingy

Sudafed PE sinus headache

An extra pen cap

A Tampon

3 store receipts

Hole puncher

Lip gloss

Blush brush

2 binder clips

a green wizzy whistle

old grocery list

purple sharpie

empty ibuprofen bottle

bouncy ball

hair band

bits of trash, pebbles,

a white rock

business cards

In Jenny Watson's Purse:

Six lipsticks

Car Keys

Cell Phone

A Nail File
Gum & Mints

Business Cards in a Very Cute Case

A old-fashioned telephone/address book

A Camera

My to-do list

A box of pens, pencils and a highlighters

A wallet

with my checkbook in it

A credit card/store bonus card holder –
receipts and bank deposit slips tucked in

A polkadot cosmetics case –
It holds reading glasses,
Band-aids, hand lotion,
ibuprofen,
a pre-pasted toothbrush,
a little flashlight,
plastic utensils,
a tape measure,
and dental floss!