Sunday, October 10, 2010

super-heros, super moms and me

I am not a super-hero.

I have always detested the term “super-mom” mostly because I will never be one. I want to be a mom but I also want to be alone for some time every day. I want to work and I also want to play. I want to be learning something new every day and I want to have a life of adventure. I want to spend no time cleaning or cooking but I want my house to be clean and I want to serve healthy meals to my family each evening. I want to wake up early and stay up late, but I also want a goodnight sleep. Did I come up with these unrealistic expectations of life all by myself? Or do you have them, too? Because the to-do list that goes along with this life is something only a super-hero (or Jenny Watson:) could accomplish.

This is why I love The Sight-Seeing Chapter: taking a fresh look at your life. There is no such thing as a plan I can create and then stick to for the rest of my life. Just as my roles, responsibilities, and resources are evolving every season, so must my perspective and my plan. What’s working in my life? What is not working? How can I set up a life that supports the person I want to be? The marriage I want to have? The family I want to grow (just to be clear, I mean grow-up not grow in numbers) and not go crazy between now and then?

As I wrote out my daily schedule, squared my exhausting moments, triangle-d my exhilarating moments, heart-ed my relational moments, and circled my alone times, I discovered the theme of my summer to be SQUARE-CIRCLE-SQUARE-CIRCLE. Which translated means exhausted/recovering/exhausted/recovering. The other morning when my husband was leaving for work he said, “Will you please take a nap today?” He was really hoping I could stay awake for our stay-at-home date that evening. I am often too tired to enjoy my favorite moment of every day which is when my husband and I finally get to connect after the kids have gone to bed.

In her book, A Weekend by the Sea, Joan Anderson writes that our time management goal is “to stop doing time and start being in time.” I want to live the days that have been gifted to me. I want to enjoy my children. I want to be fully present for my husband, my friends, and my clients. I want to celebrate important moments of life. I want to notice the simple pleasures that sparkle around my busy days. I want to know God more fully today. I want to be as much me as God created me to be.

This picture is from a serious of art cards I made for myself. I stick them next to my rear view mirror where I see them often. I use them for journaling, praying, hoping, and getting perspective. This was my first art card. A super-mom, no doubt. So why did she inspire me? Well, I noticed this little smirk on her face. And it made me realize that a super hero knows her purpose. She is practical about her strengths and her limitations. She knows what her kryptonite is and she stays away from it.

Being a real hero means letting people believe whatever they want to believe about you, while you know what is really important, when to take action and when you have to sit back and recharge.

Thoughts to Journal...

What’s working in my life?

What is not working?

How can I set up a life that supports the person I want to be?

For the relationships I want to have?

For the people I want to nurture?